True Colors Page 5

  Chase was feeling smug because a group of tweens was checking him out. They were all openly drooling over the high school seniors. The guys loved it, except a few who were serious about the game and became majorly pissed with the show offs trying to impress the girls. Their emotions were all so raw and apparent. I was surprised no one else noticed.

  Cheers went up as a point was scored. Chase ran his hand through his hair, looking annoyed that his team hadn’t gotten to the ball in time. He caught my eyes on him and I saw a flash of guilt, but it was quickly replaced by disdain. He looked away from me as if I were a stranger and focused back on the game. I couldn’t believe how quickly our relationship was over. I also couldn’t believe how much I didn’t care.

  And I had been planning on sleeping with him. Ugh!

  I looked away from the boys with a frown.

  Running my fingers through the sand, I zoned in on the feel of the grains on my skin. My head was starting to hurt again and my insides were buzzing.

  “Hello! Caitlyn?” Stella’s sharp tone made my head snap up.

  “Huh?”

  The girls all giggled at me. It was hard to tell what they were thinking. All of them were wearing big shades that covered most of their faces and hid their expressions.

  “So do you want to come?”

  I had no idea what Stella was talking about and I didn’t have a chance to ask, because Libby Phelps bounced up to us with a cheerful greeting.

  Man she looked nervous. I watched her chubby arm wave frenetically before she stopped at our feet.

  “Hey, girls.” She beamed. “How’s it going?”

  Poor Libby. I’d never really noticed her desperation before. Behind that bright smile of hers was a nervous wreck. Her eyes darted to each of us as we smiled back. I didn’t know why people had a problem with her. I mean, sure, she used to hang out with the brainiacs, which made her a slight know-it-all, but she was really sweet. Stella thought she was fat and repulsive, which was way harsh. She wasn’t that big and she had a gorgeous smile. But Stella just seemed embarrassed at having her nearby.

  I didn’t really know how Libby suddenly made it into our group. It had been a mystery that perplexed a few of us. One day we weren’t talking to her and then all of a sudden she was in. But from the expression on the faces beside me, I could tell that no one really wanted her included. I thought she was really nice. I liked her, although being the sheep that I was I behaved as though I couldn’t care less.

  I was so weak sometimes.

  I glanced at my best friend. Stella’s legs were squirming and I could tell by the tense set of her shoulders that she didn’t want the guys to see us conversing with the chubby brainiac.

  I smiled at Libby, hoping to ease her nerves a little. I could practically hear her begging us to like her as she chatted about the sun and how nice it was that the weather was warming up. Indie kept the conversation going a little, but it was so forced. It was like she was doing it under duress.

  “I love that summer is coming. Sand, surf, and bikinis. Yay.” She giggled.

  Stella’s nose wrinkled and I could tell she was picturing Libby in a bikini.

  I winced. Did she have to be so openly repulsed by it?

  I felt guilty just being near her radiating animosity.

  “You okay, Caitlyn? You look kind of pale.” Libby’s gentle, brown eyes were filled with concern as they landed on me. Genuine concern.

  It threw me a little.

  Shaking my head, I mumbled. “Just a headache.”

  “Still?” Stella looked at me. “You’ve had it all weekend. What’s wrong with you?”

  “Wow, all weekend?” Libby’s brow creased with compassion. “Maybe you should go to the doctor. When did the headache start?”

  “She’s fine, Nurse Libby. Thank you.” Stella flicked her hand, raising her shades to get a better look at me. I could see that she didn’t like someone else fussing over her best friend. Was that insecurity I glimpsed? That didn’t seem right. Stella was the most confident person I knew.

  Glancing back at Libby, I saw her face crest with disappointment over Stella’s sharp words. She looked about ready to cry, but there was a smile on her face. It took me a second, but I told my brain to see past the smile and I spotted it again. The watery grin, the wobbling lips—the effort to remain in control so we didn’t know how desperately she needed us to accept her.

  “Well, see you around then.” She waved, looking dejected as she slumped away.

  “Stella,” I whispered. “That was a bit harsh, don’t you think?”

  “What?” Stella looked confused.

  “Libby. Look how rejected she feels.” I pointed after her.

  “What are you talking about? She’s smiling.”

  Glancing back, I noticed Libby was, in fact, smiling and waving at people as she passed. She looked like a happy, carefree girl who was friends with everyone. I frowned and rubbed my temples, feeling stupid for even saying anything.

  “Seriously, Caitlyn, you have been acting so weird this weekend. What is wrong with you?”

  “I don’t know.” I squeezed my eyes shut.

  “Ever since Friday night at the club.” Stella shook her. “Did aliens snatch you and mess with your brain or something?”

  I froze. “What did you say?”

  Stella frowned. “It was only a joke, Caity. Chill out.”

  Chill out? I couldn’t! My heart was racing too fast. My mind was ready to explode.

  Friday night.

  That man...on the street...the electric shock.

  No freaking way. Did he do something to me? Was that more than just a shock?

  I had to know.

  Grabbing my bag, I flicked it onto my shoulder.

  “Caitlyn, what the hell are you doing?” Stella snapped.

  “I gotta go.” I pulled on my shoes and dug the keys out of my pocket.

  “Where?” She looked seriously pissed.

  “I’m sorry. I just...I have to go. I’ll call you later, okay?”

  “Caitlyn! Caity!”

  I ignored her calls and kept my head down as I walked up the sandy path. I was on a mission and for once I wasn’t going to let Stella’s anger stop me.

  7

  I put my foot to the floor and cruised along Pacific Coast Highway, up the California incline to Ocean Avenue, and steadily made my way back to Sunset Boulevard and Skybar at the Mondrian Hotel. Coming from the beach wasn’t the most convenient drive, but I needed to get back to the club. Although I found my way easily, I still had to park down the block. Clutching my bag to my shoulder, I walked back down the street, keeping my eyes to the ground. My emotions were zinging like bullets inside of me. I couldn’t pinpoint which one to focus on. Everything from fear to outright rage was turning my brain to spaghetti.

  The homeless man wasn’t in the spot from Friday night. Stamping my foot, I swore loudly, scaring off a woman walking past me. I ignored her. Part of me wanted to head back to my car and forget the whole thing. It was ridiculous. I was out on the street looking for some beggar, because I thought he cursed me with the ability to see everyone’s true emotions.

  I jerked to a stop.

  Yes, that was what it was.

  I was seeing who people truly were. How they really felt. The facades everyone normally hid behind weren’t there for me anymore. It was like they were laid bare, for my eyes alone.

  It felt good to define it.

  But it didn’t change the fact that I didn’t want it. I didn’t want to see what people were feeling. It was fully messing with my head and there was no way I could continue life that way.

  Shoving my hands into my pockets, I looked up the street and then down, trying to decide which way to go. How long did I look for the guy? What if he’d moved on?

  I wasn’t overly keen on searching through alley after alley of homeless people. Not to sound judgemental, but it scared me a little. What if something bad happened to me?

  Something worse tha
n what you’re already dealing with?

  I rolled my eyes.

  The mental argument raged within me as I kept walking. The least I could do was check the full length of the street. If I didn’t find him after that, I’d head back home and I don’t know...start seeking out a psychiatrist or something.

  My feet were aching by the time I reached the Standard Hollywood Hotel, further down Sunset Boulevard, and still I hadn’t seen the man yet. I was fully fighting tears as I turned to head back to my car, but then the thought that the street had two sides hit me. I crossed the busy road and started my search again.

  Ten minutes later I found him.

  It was pure chance really. I spotted a black boot sticking out from behind a dumpster. I didn’t recognize it as his or anything, but I was pretty desperate by that stage, so I headed into the fetid alleyway.

  “Hello?”

  The boot twitched.

  “Hello, sir?”

  I gingerly stepped past the green dumpster and poked my head around the corner. And there he was. Those pale eyes took me in and then a smile of recognition eased across his face.

  “You’re welcome,” he said.

  “I’m welcome?” I couldn’t help my sharp tone. Was he admitting to somehow cursing me and then expecting me to be grateful?

  He nodded and grinned, struggling up from his spot. He looked weak and tired, but once he was standing, something about his demeanour changed. He was no longer a desperate lowly man, but now stood with a confidence that was almost charming. In spite of the grey pallor of his skin, his face was the picture of serenity, his eyes dancing with a smile.

  “You were kind to me. I wanted to repay you.”

  I scoffed. “By ruining my life?”

  His forehead crinkled. “Ruining your— No. I gave you a gift.”

  “No, no you didn’t. You cursed me.” My finger was shaking as I pointed at him.

  “No.” He went to reach for my hand, but I yanked it away. “Sweet child, the ability to see behind people’s masks is a gift. It will protect you.”

  “Protect me! I’ve never felt more vulnerable.” I hadn’t actually known that, but as I said it, I realized just how susceptible I felt. I blinked away tears. “All you’ve done is exposed me to everyone’s true feelings...and you know what, I don’t like them very much!”

  “I understand.” Regret flooded his expression. A big tidal wave of it crested over his face as if he knew exactly what I meant. Squinting his eyes he looked to the ground and took a deep breath.

  His expression turned from sad to pensive as he gazed back at me.

  “What?” I barked.

  “Rather than throwing anger at me, maybe you should ask yourself why these people’s feelings bother you.”

  “They’re bothering me because my boyfriend, who I just dumped thank you very much, obviously only wanted me for sex and my best friend doesn’t even care. In fact my pain seemed to bring her joy.”

  The man studied me for a long beat before softly saying, “Well, don’t you think it’s better to know this than live with a lie?”

  “I—” Throwing my hands in the air, I stepped away from him, my ankle nearly rolling on the cracked surface. I winced and shook my head. “I…I don’t know. Lies make life easier sometimes.”

  “Ah.” The man nodded. “So, you’d rather play the ignorant fool.”

  I threw him a black glare, which made him chuckle. “It is the safer option, I guess.” Once again with the regret. His eyes brimmed with it until he blinked rapidly and shook his head. “What is your name?”

  “Caitlyn,” I murmured, crossing my arms and wrinkling my nose as a fresh whiff of garbage stench wafted up my nostrils.

  “Well, Caitlyn.” He smiled. “The first time I saw you, I knew you were a good soul, and when you came back to prove it, I knew I had to pass this gift to you. I have never shared it with anyone before.”

  His warm voice made me feel privileged somehow, but I still couldn’t stop my head from shaking. “Look mister, I appreciate that you were trying to be nice and all, but I don’t want it. So can you please just, you know, take it back?”

  He looked hurt by my suggestion, but not offended.

  It didn’t really matter what he felt, because he still shook his head. “I can’t do that. It’s yours now. I passed it onto you. I can’t take it back.”

  “So, you, you don’t have it anymore?”

  He shook his head, looking at peace about the whole thing.

  I frowned. “Well, if you liked it so much, why’d you give it away?”

  “I’m dying.” He shrugged, leaning back against the dirty, brick wall.

  My breath evaporated along with a little of my anger. I swallowed as he kept talking.

  “I don’t know how much longer I have. The day the doctors told me, I had a bit of a breakdown.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “When you can see what people are really feeling, it’s easy to tell when they think you have no chance. I knew I was terminal before they even told me.”

  “I’m—I’m sorry.”

  He flicked his hand as if it didn’t matter. “I was a busy businessman...driven. Being able to read people gave me power and I abused it.” Shame flooded his expression. “I never gave myself time to fall in love or have...a family.” His voice wavered and I could see the lie. He’d had a family all right. One he’d probably abandoned, which was why he didn’t want to say anything. What was the bet he couldn’t handle seeing what they really thought of him and so he left. My eyes narrowed as he continued talking. “And then when I had no time left, I realized I needed to pass this gift on. But I knew no one worthy of it.”

  “How did you end up on the street?”

  “When you know your life is coming to an end, things don’t matter anymore.” He tipped back on his heels. “I gave away everything I had. There were others who needed it more than me. But this gift of sight...I knew that was for someone special. I wanted someone compassionate to have it. Someone who could use it to help others.”

  “I’m not that person,” I whispered, shaking my head frantically. “Look, I’m really sorry, but I think you’ve made a mistake.”

  “On Friday night, you came back to give me money and make sure I was okay.” His eyes glimmered with an assured smile. “I’ve made no mistake. Seeing the way people react to the homeless is fascinating. I knew I’d find someone this way.”

  “So you planted yourself here? Just looking for someone?”

  He nodded. “I wanted it to be someone with means. Someone who could use their position in society to help people.”

  “I don’t have any position. I’m not famous or anything.” I spread my arms wide; incredulous that he’d chosen me, thinking I was something special.

  “But you don’t want for anything. You have money. I could see that you’re loved and cared for. You have no emotional baggage to speak of.” He tipped his head, his piercing gaze making me feel exposed and vulnerable. “You seem restless, but not unhappy. You have space in your life to help others.”

  “How do you know I have money?”

  He raised his eyebrows as if to say, “Are you kidding me?”

  I blushed and looked to the ground. “Besides, I’m a teenager, of course I have emotional baggage. You’ve read me all wrong.”

  He snickered, seeing through my lie. “Caitlyn, I want you to use this power to help people. Don’t do what I did.”

  “But...but Good Samaritan isn’t one of my career choices,” I practically whined.

  He smiled. “This is your path now, you must accept it.”

  “I don’t—I don’t want to! How am I supposed to help people? Everyone has something to hide! Everyone has problems!”

  “Focus on the ones who touch your heart. It may be one. It may be five. Spend time with them—peel back the layers. As you learn to control your vision, you’ll know what to do.” He pointed at my heart. “Ignoring this will only make you miserable. Trust me, I know.”

 
The deep shame and failure on his face made me want to cry.

  “Help those around you, one person at a time, and you will have a full and happy life. You can do what I never did.”

  Man, he wanted me to do this so badly, and I didn’t want to let him down, but this was a life-changer. Like massive. Huge. And damn it, I didn’t want it.

  “I liked my life the way it was.” I frowned. “I never asked for this. Please, don’t do this to me.”

  “I can’t change it, Caitlyn. I’ve already told you that.”

  “But...” I sighed, probably looking as desperate as I felt.

  His eyes were warm with a compassionate smile as he squeezed my shoulder. “You can do this and you will be richer for it.”

  Tears lined my lashes as he turned and shuffled down the alley. He looked weak, and the idea that his regret over being a selfish businessman may have been a lie flittered through my head, but I had seen his face. He had told me the truth.

  I walked out of the alley and leaned my head against the wall, feeling desperate, afraid, annoyed...everything I probably shouldn’t have.

  The urge to chase after the man and demand more was pretty strong, but I knew it was pointless. I was stuck with this gift and there was nothing I could do about it. With a reluctant sigh, I realized that if I was going to take this on then I should probably understand how it all worked. Like how did he get his power in the first place and how did he learn to control it?

  I stepped back into the alley.

  “Wait! I have a few more questions.” I looked in the direction he’d shuffled off, but he was gone. “Hello?”

  Running further into the alley, I looked into doorways and searched for any other exits, but there were none. Had he seriously just vanished into thin air?

  I was basically at the dead end when I found him. He was lying on the ground, a serene smile perched on his lips. I knew it before I touched him, frantically hunting for a pulse. There was none. He had obviously waited around long enough for me to find him again. One last explanation before he left.